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Heart pounding,
Breath rasping,
Muscles screaming,
Body pushed to it's limit
But I try for that little bit more.
I compete on only myself,
To see how far I can go,
Before I have to slow down.

The Final Tie

Why did I let myself fall so far?
When I knew you would injure my heart.

From the start of this rollercoaster we've had,
I knew I was in deeper than you.
But as often as I tried to extract myself
I found I couldn't cut that final tie
And would get pulled back in to start again.

But now you have severed that tie for me,
And I can start to set myself free,
And finally heal this wound you have made.

Rage Inside

Blood boiling, rage seething,
My base emotions running wild
I haven't felt a pain like this
For quite a long time now.

But the familiar sensations,
Flood their way through my system
And I am caught in the flow.

As much as I know I should fight against it
I find that I cannot.

Your betrayal of what I thought we had
Has wounded my soul too deeply,
For me to fight against this flow of emotion.

So for now I am a creature of rage,
I wonder how long this will last?

Be glad that you are so far away
And I cannot unlease this torrent on you!

The End

It hurt so much, when you walked away,
But I knew deep down it was for the best.
We had good times
In our years together
But towards the end
It started to go wrong.
We were no longer a cohesive unit
Working together for a common goal.
Instead we spent the time
Hurting each other with our words and actions.
Hating the fact we couldn't bring ourselves
To end the farce we had become.
So as much as it hurt
And I cried when it happened
I am glad that we are both free.

Daydreaming of You

I sit here at work
Daydreaming of you
Of walking through the door
Into your welcoming embrace.
These thoughts are all that get me through the day
Knowing you will be waiting for me
To fall into your warmth
And rest my weary head
My body snug and warm.
I will be with you soon
My precious, wonderful bed.
My sanctuary
My sanity
My place to dream away.

Entitled

Why do people do this?
Think that they are entitled.
To all these different things
That they have done nothing to earn
Yet everything to lose!!

Happy Place

I know it is wrong
But it feels so right
Your hand upon my skin
Turning it a rosy red
So I understand my place.

The feel of the leather
As it hits my back
The gasps it elicits from me
Teach me what you want of me
In the most effective way.

The sting of the rattan
As it lands and leaves it mark
The red hot line of sting
Makes me realise what I want and who I want to be,
The girl at your feet,
Molded to your ideal and whim
This is the happy place I am in.

Decisions

The mear idea repulses me
But fascinates me as well.
I want to run away
But I want to try as well.
Decisions and choices that I must make.
I wonder which I will choose?
To run and hide
Or face the scary truth??

Tormented Cravings

The cravings they are always there,
Sometimes I can ignore them,
Pretend they don't exist.

But other time the scream at me,
Demanding my attention.

It's times like this I come to you,
To beg and plead my case.
But as often as you promise,
I know that you'll forget.

And I will be left in torment
To deal with this alone.

Starry Darkness

The sky is gray
The light is low,
Dusk is drawing in.
I sit and stare
At the bare tree branches,
Waiting for night to fall.
So I can bundle up
Against the winters cold,
And take a walk in the starry darkness.

Teaching

Sitting, Staring,
Waiting, Watching,
For my protege to learn.

I can teach her the basics,
of what we do.

But she must find her own way
To get through the day
And do what it is we do!